This is me thinking at 4 in the morning, waiting to greet the sun. Sometimes I think about you on repeat for some hours now. Insomnia at its finest.

writing every word that comes to my brain and it all adds up to you.
strong possibility that I’m still in love with you.
I know its unhealthy but I don’t want to fight the feeling.
because nothing else in the world can make me feel what I’m feeling.
maybe the reason is because we never found closure.
or maybe its because we really aren’t over.
well in my mind we aren’t.
I don’t know what it is but you got a hold on me.
I think I’m addicted to not having you fully.
it could be just the chase & the trill of this love.
or maybe its because every time I hear your voice my heart drops.
you keep my mind in a maze & I’m loving the game.
even though I always lose and you always run away.
sleeping on the thought of knowing you’ll come back.
because in all actuality my ass is just attached.
being able to touch you is all I’m wishing for.
I even sit & daydream about you dancing when I’m bored.
your face blessed every page of the book in my mind.
and I keep every memory of us in the back of my mind.
hoping one day that maybe we’ll rewind.
until all this that I have vanishes in time.
knowing that my feelings are never reciprocated.
doesn’t change the fact that you’re all that I want.
if I had to choose one thing that would stay with me forever, of course it would be you.
you’re like the part of my life that I live through you.
with that being said I see myself in you.
that’s probably one of the main reasons I’m so attracted to you.
me & you are like the sun and the moon.
strong on its own but together a powerful force.
you naasira are my better half.
I dream about you sometimes.
you in a beautiful white dress & me in a fitted womans suit.
our house on a hill with the children playing in the yard.
us growing old but never growing apart.
but then I wake up and realize it was just a dream.
and at that very moment I force myself back to sleep.
because the thought of you being mine forever makes me feel invincible.
like I can do anything as long as you’re by my side.
now if you actually read this, this isn’t even the half.
words can’t explain every feeling that I have.
for you I hope that I can make all your troubles go away.
I hope that I can compliment you like your favorite accessory.
and that I make you feel as important as a queen should feel.
you are the reason for my will to live.
i’ll love you forever, even when I’m dead and gone.
til’ then i’ll see you in my dreams until you’re back in my arms again.
I love you Naasira